For the last post of the week, I turn to two other bloggers who’ve written some compelling stuff in the last week. The posts don’t relate directly to MN, but they’re very much worth the read. Shouts out to Joy Lieberthal Rho and Margie Perscheid. For real. We have some fine writers in the community.
My Birthmother, Part I: “The days preceding my meeting with my birthmother remain crystal clear in my mind. I got a call on a Monday from my Unnee (one of my big sisters from the orphanage, who works for the Directress of the orphanage.) She received a call she felt was very important. Immediately she shared that my birthmother has come forward and wants to meet me. I was stunned. All my life, I believed that my birthmother had died and at the hands of my birthfather. That was the story I told my parents and it was the story I held onto as my truth. I have come to realize that my little six year old head could not deal with the loss of my mother and believed what many adults told me as to the reason I was no longer with her.”
Adoptees get the last word. Period.: “Adoption is so not about me, but I still need to try to “get it.” Trying alone is a worthy goal, because you can learn a lot along the way. Trying includes taking it on the chin from time to time, even when you think you don’t deserve it. There may be more real learning in licking our wounds after a painful interaction than in reading a respectfully-delivered critique, if we make the effort to listen without ego. Respectful dialog may actually have the unintended consequence of leaving the door open for disagreement on issues that deserve none.”